Beardvengers, Assemble!

Line up, everybeardy!

Marvel's "The Avengers" comes out this Thursday at midnight, and we beardlings are headed there like a demigod out of Valhalla.

There are plenty of heroes that are shaved clean, but we prefer them with the scruff of our peoples.

However, though we all know that heroes are all better bearded (they just are), you can bet your sweet patoot that there would be some rather interesting villians around if that were the case.

Most of the baddies we see nowadays are out for simple things: revenge, world domination, wanting to reclaim the world for Mother Earth, and so on and so forth. But with so much hair around in the hero realm, we'd be seeing a whole lot more of this guy:

Apparently this chap, a very real DC villian, mind you, is called The Beard Hunter. Born with a hormone deficiency that prevented him from growing a beard, Ernest Franklin grew resentful of beards and begun a one-man war against facial hair. That's right, his mission is to hunt down and kill unfortunate bearded individuals and take their beards as trophies. He may have started this vilianous behaviour when he was a boy, but apparently still continues it at thirty-six while living at home with his mother. Good for him. When not committing murder he's obsessed with body-building magazines. Exactly the sort of villian we can all root for. I'm sure Tony Stark would be pleased to make the Beard Hunter's list with his gotee. It'd give him the chance to knock this silly shaver into next week. Fortunately, I think any one of us Bearded could do the same.

Stay heroic, beardians. Snag a Viking Beard tee to wear to the premier this weekend. We're sure Thor would be in your corner if the world were falling to pieces.

Beard on! :)>